Yesterday’s Breakfast

I know famous people are all around me, and curiosity seekers, and potential brides and husbands. The help at breakfast usually pretty good. One of the gals at breakfast who I suspect is a singer, was in a mood yesterday and I suspect annoyed with me just for who I am. I’m kind of used to it. Now having breakfast every morning there, and spending upwards and over a hundred bucks I was left with a burning question…Why is the bread toasted on only one side? #1 and I thought this was pretty funny and interesting (I think I’m up to 13 now). I suspected the toaster was on bagel settings. So I asked her about this and demonstrated how one side of the toast was brown and the other white. I also explained how the sunny side up egg would slide off the undarkened side of the toast because the coefficient of friction was too low. She explained about the toaster being broken. She left and I could sense her annoyance with me so I decided to listen to her thoughts. I’m from NY and I love hearing crappy thoughts about me just because we New Yorkers dig this stuff. So this is what she was thinking: “This is the most important person on the planet and all he can do is complain about the toast. Doesn’t he have anything more important to do.” I think there was more that that was the meaty gist of it, there may have been some expletives. I said he’d take care of it but I wanted to talk with her so when she came back I said this to her. “I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking I should be doing something more important than complain about the toast. I explained to her how important it is to take care of the little things first as they came up. She realized I was listening to her thoughts and she displayed about as much embarrassment as any actress can muster and said something to the effect, “Yeah, I guess if you handle the small stuff first everything else in the day falls into place.”

I guess I was a little pissed off at her and then royally cursed her out. I work hard in this community and around the world. Serve me my fucking breakfast and shut the fuck up…more or less.” I was surprised I said that cause I’ve been pretty polite lately. She mostly apologized and then provided me with an oral favor which usually works in lieu of an apology as it did yesterday.

I like for people to have a pretty good idea what I’m about epecially since I don’t recall doing anything negative to her and tip well and work hard.

Despite the fact that my bread was only half toasted yesterday I managed to take 30-40 thousand off the game board and still get dicked over.

Make my fucking toast right bitch and this won’t come up again…bitch.

 

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